Wednesday, January 13, 2010

The Economy is Bad, Folks . . .



How bad?  It's so bad that . . . 

  • I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
  • I ordered a burger at McDonald's and the kid behind the counter asked, "Can you afford fries with that?"
  • CEO's are now playing miniature golf.
  • If the bank returns your check marked  "Insufficient Funds," you call them and ask if they meant you or them.
  • Hot Wheels and Matchbox stocks are trading higher than GM.
  • McDonald's is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
  • Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children's names.
  • A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico .
  • Dick Cheney took his stockbroker hunting.
  • Motel Six won't leave the light on anymore.
  • The Mafia is laying off judges.
  • Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
  • Congress says they are looking into this Bernard Madoff scandal. Oh Great!! The guy who made $50 Billion disappear is being investigated by the people who made $1.5 Trillion disappear!
  • And, finally...
  • I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc.,  I called the Suicide Lifeline. I got a call center in Pakistan , and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.
(This came via email, without attribution.  If anyone knows who came up with these, I'd be happy to add a reference.)

1 comment:

Thimbleanna said...

Hahaha! That's the best goofy e-mail list I've read in a LONG time! Thanks for sharing!